Thursday, May 21, 2009

Our Deepest Fear

My deepest fear is not that I'm powerful beyond measure, but that I'm inadequate.
I'm a quiet, introverted person. When I don't know people well at all, I sometimes hesitate to challenge people on negative comments about sexual orientation or race, but there are times I do. I never join in. However, there is one topic I find very difficult to address - mental health.
This is an example I observe frequently. I really hate it when people call someone bipolar just because they're nice to someone one second then say something angrily later . This is not the only criteria. Can someone who does that have bipolar or a mood disorder do that? Yes. But not everyone. And it really offends those people who do have it. It's really difficult for some people to challenge the person making this comment because of the stigma surrounding mental illness. Also, it's often assumed that this person has whatever. I've only said something to a person making a rude comment two times I can remember. I felt good about saying something, but at the same time I felt ashamed and nervous. It's not just people with mood disorders (depression, bipolar, forms within those) and certain behaviors (such as eating disorders, self harm, etc.) who deal with these problems, but anyone who feels like they have to hide. 
I really want to accept myself. There's no need to make things public, but I wish I didn't have a huge fear of people finding out because I think they'll look at me as crazy. A lot of people actually have mental health issues who are stable and they appear to be "normal". I'm fearful that I will be inadequate for the rest of my life. However, once others and I can feel comfortable with myself, I hope that others feeling scared will do the same. Do I think that the stigma will ever go completely away? No. But I do think when more people feel liberated, at least some progress will be made. Maybe out deepest fear will no longer be that we are inadequate. 

1 comment:

Ms. Pfan said...

This is very well-said, and an important thing to say. Nice job.